I haven’t really spoken much from the heart of late, its been very much a documentation of each process, moving along.
10 weeks in now and even though its not finished, we have a home. We have spaces, places, favorite corners! There are days when I feel a great calm and then others when all I want to do is cry. Life is about that, moving around our spaces, moving around our emotions, balancing between what is real and what is possible. Checking, forgetting, rushing, breathing… there will always be cracks.
We must tear ourselves apart a thousand times a day and then build ourselves up again. The house reminds me of that. Everything arrives on site neatly packaged. Then for a while its chaotic and messy and then … a smooth calm, when the dust settles and the shavings are swept away. The wood is stacked, the doors closed, the keys turned. Clunk!